Monday, November 16, 2009
Second Semester started today. Well, so far, so boring.
Our first subject was Data Structure and Algorithms in Java. Our professor was newly hired and about to teach this sem. Since she was new, I thought she would do a little impressive stuffs or entertaining, entertainment is such way thet could catch up the attention of the whole clas, but then...I guess, she didn't make us interested on the subject. (I hope that Data Stucture and Algorithms will never be a problem or worst to me.) She was just telling everything about her, about her past experiences in college, the dates, the places...ugh!!!! I know it was good to know your teacher, but all out of heck go on with the more interesting stuff. I got her point for us to be closer to her and got inspired with her stories, okay...that was good..but, I dunno...I wasn't interested hearing her stories that time. (Sorry for being inconsiderate and impulsive one, but...it's my college now, just go on with the 'topic')
After the first class, well...Lunch Break...
We only got one hour break...Ok..nothing to deal with that, however....I was freaking out for what food I wanted to eat knowing that I was in insanity of Dieting- I was Frustrated of my figure coz I gain 2lbs..!!!
Oh well, I ate pasta..(ugh! carbohydrates!) and set my mind that it would fit me and I wouldn't find for another. For you to know guys, I am only 16 now but I am a figure concious...oh well, it is my faul why I gained much; I ate much Chocolate last Semestral break...
Third class, Last subject to attend: Computer Programming 2
Oh well, I didn't get bored much coz our teacher was Mr. Alfonso. Well, he was funny, loud and approachable, I wished. He noticed me easily, well...who wouldn't, I am the daughter of the dean. Anyway, we just looked for our "finals-groupmates" and he proposed the incoming projects etc. Well, nothing done much today, just intoducing and looking with the faces of my classmates.
Speaking of them, I met new faces in my section, but I still have some of my "old classmates" last sem. I got different expressions to them, but I think they are all nice...
I am now inside our school Comp Lab, writting this Journal while waiting for my mom. hahaha!!! I guess, I must go now before the computers are forced to shutdown. You know what I mean, I must go...
...xX kHaRLy@AiCHini Xx...
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
September 25, 2009
It was raining hard and the clouds were so gray. The ambiance was so blue and it fitted me so. My best day of the year became the worst and somehow, my dream came true.
In every beginning there was always an end. However happy you were at the start, it always ended up with pain in your heart. No matter how much you prepare yourself to accept, it still left you wounded. Even though you found the clarity you wished for, even though you said to yourself that you were satisfied, I knew, it still hurt you, no matter how deep or how shallow. So, why saying that there was a happy ending in every story, if in every end there was someone or something important had to pass away.
Sometimes, you had to end some stuffs that for you was foolishness or worthless. Though it was really hard to stop you have to just for you not to feel hurt, like saying the truth; the truth that would set anyone free. Though it was really that throbbing, but if that was the only way to set you free, and then took the risk. Life was very unfair for it wanted to give you challenge not sorrow. For it wanted to make you realize of things you got not let them lost.
I wrote this blog for me to carry all out my burden, this burden that love gave me. I wrote this for I could clear my mind and comfort my heart. I lost someone that I considered as a part of me. I lost him not by will but by please. He wanted to end what we got, so did
He believed in his “First Love” and I believed in “Love Game.” He couldn’t free himself from the cage of past, and I learned from my lessons much. For me “Love is stupidity” and for him, “Love is sacred.” In that point of views, we really differ, we couldn’t meet. I tried to understand him, but I was too selfish, I couldn’t. I always prior myself, my own feelings and perception rather the things that could make our situation better.
But now, the clarity that I’ve been looking for is now all in my mind. With that simple conversation, all the questions in my mind fade away. All the “if’s” in me disappear. I settled myself this way, doing the old routine, when he wasn’t with me before. He settled in a way by forgetting things. Thinking that there was no big deal and looking at me as a friend, a very close friend.
And again, I proved that there will never be a happy ending in a wrong beginning. There will never be an effective relationship if nothing exists or you’re not working as one. Where, when there is always love, hurt, trials, and pain will come that we should accept and surpass. That Loving is stupidity. Man’s love to woman or woman’s to man is completely idiotic. But, human commits mistakes for they are not perfect. Though they know what might happen, and how risky the situation is, they still try. Though they know they will be considered as stupid, they still do, for they can find their “happiness” there and making the impossible things possible for them. And that’s the counter-effect of pain we feel, “learning and striving hard” for that “Love.”