Tuesday, April 6, 2010
(I wrote this blog for my dearest friend, Bernadette Relox.)
Friendship. This is where the social life of an individual starts. This brings color to one’s life; it beautifies one’s relationship to others. We all have friends to hold on and to laugh with. We have friends to share our thoughts and to complete our lives. Friends. The dearest persons on earth who touch your heart. They are the ones who are with you when you need someone to talk with. Friends, not only in bad times but also in good times of your life. Friends, who make you feel strong and over confident when you are together. The ones who help you when you feel dumb in your homework and broken in love. These are the people you used to be with when you are in the mall, shopping, when you are in the bar, drinking, or even when you are online in facebook, chatting. Your friends are outnumbered, but only few really stay.
You can find your friends inside your house, inside your school, or even in your community. However, only your heart can really define who are real and who are not. Only your mind can judge what you think their true personality, their true attitude will be. Only your heart can greatly feel their care and love for you. Never your eyes, which only depend on the façade it see. Never your ears, which only depend on the sweet words it hear. Never your hands, which only hold on others then eventually open to release them. Those are not your critique forever but your heart and mind. But tell me, you mostly use those three until the time you get hurt, aren't you?
In friendship, the main problem here is betrayal – Your friend/s or maybe YOU deceive you or your own friend for his/her or your own happiness. Everyone knows how painful to have a friend or friends who is or are dearest to you betray/s you not only once in a short period of time but many times for a long time. If you are these guy or girl that I am describing about, I understand your grief, but if not, c’mon! No big deal at all.
You are so loyal and true to him or her. You really value your friendship and you give importance into it more than anything. You consider your friends as a big part of your life that actually completed you. You treat him/her like a brother or sister; you give more time to him or her than your boyfriend or girlfriend. You never refuse his or her calls whenever she or he needs you. You never fail to help him or her though he or she doesn’t ask you. You never give doubts in all unreasonable mistakes he or she did, or not even a single doubt whenever you know he or she tells a lie in front of your face, though that really hurt you. You never complain in all those things he/she did, for you know it’s for his or her own happiness. You still act strong in front of him or her even though your heart surrenders; it wanted to rest. You prioritize his/her needs than yours, you give all you can, do all the impossible things just for you to show the importance of your friend. But in the end, he or she betrays you.
I’m telling you, you never lack in all matters of friendship. You just give all, for you think he or she is the one you wanted to be with and share your life till you get old. For you think he or she in the only person that makes you happy and love, though he or she really doesn’t mean all his or her cares. For you don’t want to lose him or her so it is fine to give up all. You did your part. You are a very very good friend, but dear, he or she still deceives you. Do not blame yourself or anybody of what he or she did whatever the reason behind. Do not ask where you lack for you already give much. You did not do anything wrong except the fact that you let him or her fools you. The fact that he or she did not appreciate all you did, and the fact that he or she can’t do the same thing you did for him or her, are the facts that tell you that he or she doesn’t worth you as a friend; these are the facts that you should know and learn. STOP!
Do not be blinded of the false happiness he or she gave. Only time can really tell if he or she is true or not. Only the time can show you his or her true color. Do not give all you have, for you are only with him or her in the short period of time. Do not be deceived in the feeling of pleasure he or she gave or even to the words he or she said. If you don’t want your outnumbered friends deceive you, do not be deceived by the false happiness you immediately feel.
What to do in order for you to move on?
Let go of that friend who betrays you. He or she is just a vexation to you. You can’t do anything to make him or her change. Though you still give a chance, it won’t heal the scars he or she made. It won’t change the truth that you once lose yourself because of him or her.
If you still want him or her to be part of you, then don’t let him or her touch your life greatly. Don’t be martyr and stupid. Learn from the lessons you gained from what he or she did. Allow him to be still part of your life, but never be the same again.